This is a sponsored post for Kellogg's Chocos #Khuljaye
Bachpan Campaign and was first published on MyCity4Kids.com
Remember that scene from the movie Dilwale Dulhania Le
Jayenge where Simran tells Raj about her family? Am not all that sure but
I think it goes something like this – “Ghar mein bas hum char hain. Chutki
apni umar se kuch jyada hi badi hai ….. Aur maa, friend jyada maa kam!”
(It’s just the four of us at home– Chutki (my sister) is way older than
her age…and mom… she’s more a friend than a mother…)
Well, growing up, this was very similar to how things were
with me and my Mum. She was my trusted friend and confidant. Always the first
to know of my new friends, my first crush, my first heartbreak; my favourite
actors, movies, books – just about everything! She was and continues to
be the keeper of my secrets and knows of all that really matters to me. Our relationship
has been such that I have never felt the need to keep anything from her.
Despite the age difference between us, she could understand things from my
perspective. Be it a mention about children trying out smoking behind the
school or about girls and boys sneaking away in corners where they could stay
unseen for hours, she never once made me feel uncomfortable or bad that I was
noticing these things or that I was thinking about them or was curious about
them.
No matter what the discussion was about – boys or cigarettes
or wine or sex – Mum always addressed my curiosity; and at the end of every
discussion with her, I had the feeling that I now knew something new and good.
That is not to say that we didn’t have our typical mother-daughter moments, of
course we did – there were dresses that she expected me to wear and there were
dresses I preferred instead; there was always hair to be done a certain way and
of course, how can I forget the one about ‘expected social behaviour’ on my
part vis a vis my real behaviour; and my teenage was surely the time when Mum
almost lost it! But despite all that, my friendship with Mum continues till
date even now that I am a mother myself.
In fact, as a mother now, I look up to her all the more. But
that is now. Before I got confident in this “mom-skin” though, I used to get
these serious doubts – what kind of a mother would I be? Would my little one
want to be friends with me? Would I have long chats and discussions with my
little one the way I have always had with my Mum; and more importantly – would
my little one really think I make a difference to his/her life the way I am
confident Mum made to mine?
Of course, once my little one was born, the first few years
went by like a breeze! Even when he started school, things were still fun. But
when he started grade-school, I began to worry again. Grade school is a whole
different thing. Needless to say, all my worries about being a friend to my
little one returned with a vengeance.
This was the case until recently, when we were watching TV
one day and an advert came on about how smoking is injurious to health. We both
saw the ad and he asked me, “Mum when people know smoking is so bad and
causes all these serious diseases, why do they still continue to do it? And why
do the shops not stop selling cigarettes in the first place so that people
don’t buy them?” That day we had a good long discussion about how smoking
is bad and how it should be avoided at all costs; but that it is so addictive
that you just can’t quit it that easily once you start and on and on we went.
That day I felt like life had come full circle – here we
were, my little one and I, having a long chat just the way I used to have with
Mum! This was awesome, that my little one and I can now talk about anything
under the Sun!
The apple doesn’t fall much far from the tree, I guess; and
I am happy to have been lucky to have Mum by my side; who showed me by example
how easy it is to be a “buddy” to your children rather than just being “Mom”
all the time.
We always want to give the best to our children and what can
be better than our attention and availability for them? I know I have the
rebellious teen years ahead of me still, and if my own teenage is any
indication, then I know I am going to have my hands full! But right now, here I
am, opening the doors of friendship for my little one with the hope that we
stay friends for life, the way I have with my Mum! Here I am hoping with all my
heart that the legacy continues…
#KhuljayeBachpan
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