Rashmi's Space

It was 9:30am. The family was having breakfast. Priti poured out coffee for herself and the husband; and milk for sonny boy.  The husband sat at the head of the table, reading news on his smartphone, absently sipping his coffee. Sonny talked animatedly about the game he had played with his friends this morning. He’d taken two wickets, he informed them; and then all the boys had chatted, he said, sitting around on the lawn, sipping from their water bottles, cooling off.    “What did you guys chat about” Priti asked. “Oh, this and that,” sonny said. “Sharav saw that latest Avengers movie this weekend, and he was telling us all about that. Sandy went to watch the IPL match at the stadium yesterday, only to have the game abandoned due to rain! But then he got to see what the groundskeepers did to clear the rainwater and shit…” “Language,” “Sorry…” Priti smiled. “What else?” “Oh, you know Pranav? He went to this tea estate with his famil...

Every house has a routine. Every family has a routine. The husband does a few things, the wife does a few; and the daily grind goes on, like clockwork. So long as everyone sticks to their jobs, and does them perfectly, things go right. Kids reach school on time, adults get to work on time, and all is right with the world. Of course, as simple as it sounds, it also sometimes gets monotonous with everyone just doing ‘the same old.’ And every once in a while, the thought does occur – what if, say, one day the husband did the cooking and the wife drove the kids to school? Wouldn’t it be great to just drive, with songs on, drop the kids, and on the way back, listen to one’s favourite songs? Ah, what a blissful hour that would be! What’s more, there would be hot breakfast ready, thanks to the husband who would have been busy in the kitchen while the wife was out driving and listening to songs – I mean, dropping the kids to school… And then, some days, the smooth clockwork ...

We are all taught right from childhood that being merely ‘okay’ isn’t enough. That we should be first in the race, not be in the ‘also ran’ category, because, of course, there is always room at the top; and that we can get there if we can only push ourselves to the maximum possible extent. And we believe this our entire lives and keep pushing ourselves more and more and more. And when we have children, we teach them the same thing. We teach them to be the ‘top of the bunch,’ to ‘push themselves to excel in whatever they do.’ We tell them, “if you want to do something, do it the best, otherwise there is no point doing it!” We tell them, “no one remembers the second best, but no one forgets the best! So be the best!” We tell them, “It is important to be someone people look up to, and not someone who isn’t even noticed!” But have we, even once, thought if it is really necessary to excel at everything we do? Why is it that we have this compulsion to be ‘the best’? And reall...

Many different teachers come in our lives and initiate us in this world through their passion and with the help of their own experience and knowledge. And while each of them do justice to this calling in their own special way and while every single one of them is special, there is always one or the other who is a particular favourite with children. Of course, this has more to do with the children than the teacher herself/himself; because one seeks and relates to only what one can appreciate. And so, if you want to know if there’s a certain teacher your little one thinks is special, and why, the best way to do that, is to ask the little one directly! For me, this was much easier till a few years back, when, like they show in advertisements, I could sit with my little one, a plate of cookies between us on the table, and pretended to ask him casually, who his favourite teacher was. Because, that time, you see, he was so young and so naïve, he would be happy to chat. But as he gro...

When people ask me what I do, I tell them I am a blogger, a writer. The immediate next question, of course, is “what do you write?” And I say I write on positive parenting, among other things. So they say, oh great, a lot of people are writing about parenting these days, it makes for interesting reading. And I say, but I don’t just write about parenting, I write about positive parenting. There is a difference. (Which reminds me of an advert from my childhood: ____ hot and sweet tomato chilli sauce, its different!) Cheesy, I know, but it is true. There is a difference. All parenting is not positive parenting. But all positive parenting is definitely good parenting. Parenting There was a time when “parenting” was not a term most parents bothered about. Take a look at