The Vacation That Went Nowhere

It was 9:30am.

The family was having breakfast. Priti poured out coffee for herself and the husband; and milk for sonny boy. 

The husband sat at the head of the table, reading news on his smartphone, absently sipping his coffee. Sonny talked animatedly about the game he had played with his friends this morning. He’d taken two wickets, he informed them; and then all the boys had chatted, he said, sitting around on the lawn, sipping from their water bottles, cooling off.  

“What did you guys chat about” Priti asked.

“Oh, this and that,” sonny said. “Sharav saw that latest Avengers movie this weekend, and he was telling us all about that. Sandy went to watch the IPL match at the stadium yesterday, only to have the game abandoned due to rain! But then he got to see what the groundskeepers did to clear the rainwater and shit…”

“Language,”

“Sorry…”

Priti smiled. “What else?”

“Oh, you know Pranav? He went to this tea estate with his family, and he took his bike with him to ride it when they were there…”

“Oh, nice…” 

“Can we also go on vacation?” 

“Oh, sonny, err… Dad has just started work for this new client… you have seen he’s been working late these last couple of weeks…” Priti began, only to be interrupted by the husband.

“Where do you want to go?”

It took her a moment to realise that her husband had actually put his phone away, and was paying attention to the conversation around the table! But even before she could feel happy about that, she was shocked to hear the next words coming out of his mouth.

“How about we drive down somewhere?”

She stared at him astonished, as he shrugged self-consciously, “What? This weekend is a bit free for me. I don’t mind going away for a couple of days, actually,” he smiled. “We’ll have a great time travelling together!” he said, beaming at her from across the table.

Priti sipped from her water glass, hoping her grimace would be taken for a smile. What was it with men and driving? Anytime the mention of a trip came up, the husband was always ready to drive down to the place and back. Priti loved driving too; in fact, she preferred to drive at least halfway on most trips as a rule, sharing the driving (and any and every discomfort that came with it)…. so it wasn’t the driving that worried her. But it was the fact that, when she drove, the husband got so bored sitting in the passenger seat, that he actually dozed off! And Priti had heard enough stories about accidents that occurred when passengers slept off, leaving only the driver awake on long drives, to be scared out of her wits!

“Hhmm….how about taking a train journey somewhere?” she asked now, trying a different tack “That way we’ll have a great time travelling together, and we won’t even have to tire ourselves out driving! What say?”

But even as the husband ruminated on that, sonny boy chirped up, “You know, Sandy was telling us about this cruise he went on!” he said. “It’s so cool! Dad, can we go on a cruise? Can we?”

“Now, that’s something I would love to try,” the husband said.

“It’s soooooo cool, Dad! They have this pool room, and this deck, where we can chill out; and there’s also…”

Priti loved their enthusiasm, she really did; but she was terrified of cruises!

For one, she had never learnt to swim, (neither had the husband); and being surrounded by nothing but water for as far as the eye can see, bobbing into nothingness, was not her idea of a relaxed vacation. She had watched Titanic, and Cast Away; not to mention Life of Pi! And while her sane mind told her, that she was very unlikely to find a live Bengal Tiger on a cruise, or hit a glacier in the Arabian Sea; she was still terrified of ending up in the water for all eternity, with just a wooden plank to save her, if that!

Honestly, Priti was petrified! She was an out-and-out urbanite. A city-dweller through and through. 

She was even scared to go out in the dark in her own backyard. She was more a daytime person. And also, a land person. How some people could eat, drink, sleep, and enjoy bobbing up and down on waves, was, honestly, a mystery to her. Oh yes, a cruise was an experience of a lifetime; she’d heard it many times – but it wasn’t her cup of tea, thank you very much!

“What do you say, Priti?” the husband interrupted her morbid thoughts, “wanna go on the cruise? Bobbing up and down….” he asked, with twinkling eyes.  

“Mmm…. a cruise would be expensive, no?” she tried to appeal to the husband’s fiscal side, the twinkle in his eyes be damned!  

But nothing was going in her favour today. And the husband actually surprised her (again) by saying, 

“Let me check.” And to her utter dismay, went on to consult his phone for more insight. “The way I see it,” he reasoned, “it should work out something close to plane tickets anyway, seeing as we are thinking of last minute bookings….”

Priti sighed. So much for trying to appeal to his fiscal side.

Truth be told, Priti loved vacations as much as the next person. Only, her ideas of a vacation didn’t involve driving, or sailing… they mainly involved flying or taking a train to some exotic location (yeah, yeah, Goa was fine too!), where she could check into some resort and book spa appointments for the duration of their stay. Where she could be pampered. Where she could sit on some beach maybe – not swim, mind you, just sit – or relax in a hammock and read to her heart’s content. Or visit some museum, or a botanical garden and have a little picnic with her family. Basically, just relax.

And weren’t vacations supposed to be all about relaxation anyway? Relaxation – as opposed to stressing out, or worrying – but none of her vacations so far had been like that. Most of them involved visiting family, or attending weddings of enthusiastic friends and family… None had involved a spa. Nor the relaxed reading. Sigh!    

Her reverie was broken when an argument broke out between the husband and sonny boy about something.

“You don’t have to lug your bags around if you drive, is all I am saying.”

“Luggage is just a small part of the trip, Dad!”

“For you, sonny boy! Because we carry it all for you…”

“But…”

“You know what? You are old enough now. From now on, you carry your own luggage!”

“Whoa! Dad! I didn’t… What are you…? Mum! Say something!”

“Yeah, Priti, say something, you want to drive somewhere, or take a cruise? Honestly, I am okay with anything,” said the husband, contradicting the very argument he had presented to sonny boy a moment before.  

“Mmm…” Priti decided to go out on a limb. (What was the worst that could happen? Another vacation without a spa? She’d live.) “Could we go somewhere with a spa and indoor pool or play area? Just… relax?” she ventured.

“Indoor?”

“Yeah, I am okay with that,” to her surprise, sonny boy agreed! Maybe he thought he would have to lug his luggage around less that way.

“Okay with that?” the husband was incredulous. “Indoor vacation? Really? If that’s all you want, then you might as well go play in the club house in the next block! Why go anywhere at all?!” he put up his hands.

Sigh!

“But Dad…!”

“What?”

“Listen, guys…”

And on and on it went. About a vacation that wasn’t really going anywhere.

Last heard, Priti was still trying to convince the husband for a spa holiday (dangling the ‘couple massage’ as a bait… trying to appeal to the twinkle in his eye, this time); and sonny boy was trying to impress Priti with the ‘uber coolness’ of taking a cruise.

Once the family finally decides on their vacation (if, the family decides…) Priti is looking forward to a relaxed (?) vacation that they can all enjoy. Maybe.     

Image by Stefan Schweihofer from Pixabay